every morning i wake up dreading myself completely. every evening i am sane enough to eat my dinner. every night the dream is the same - fire burning burning burning scorching my useless self.

tsering

This morning tsering called me and told that her roomy was behaving very badly with her. She shouted and screamed at her. She couldnot take it at all. From my eyes, basically it was my friends fault and the other girl dealt it very poorly. anyway, I wish she passes her test and leads a happy life. otherwise I had a good day learning the diagnostic and the disease process of cardiac. God plz help me with my endeavour  and reach my goal....thank you god

life

Life is very strange and my thoughts are stranger. I go through series of thoughts and in the end I go into my own fantasy and be happy with it or go in to some assumptions which makes me sad at times. At this point of my life I really have no idea where I am heading, in the sense of this mundane thing.....On one hand I am so confused with G's response.....I am extremely sad when I think of him....I do have deep respect for him as a human being....I really cannot understand why on earth he touched me. I cant imagine myself succumbing to it. I am really ashamed if he had planned all of it and touched me, and if not did I do something wrong that he wanted to stop all of it suddenly. I am totally confused. The only thing clear is that I know I love him and will have the same kind of feelings for him throughout my life. I am deeply saddened by whatever happened between us. I presume that he doesn't want to be disturbed and wants a quiet life......but why does he wants to keep the friendship between us. I really dont know what is going on in his head. He says he has feelings for me but doesnt want to be involved with me. I am tired of thinking and maybe drown myself into pool of tears. My friend thinks that I am the happiest person around. they really dont know what is going on in my head. In my head, rubble is boiling and I cant talk it out.....I dont understand why he wants to keep everything so secretive??? God, plz save me from this suffering....